April 29, 2009 River Street Jazz Cafe, Plains, Pennsylvania
Moonalice poster by Chris Shaw

Legend

According to Wikipedia, the original native tribes in this area were the Shawanese and the Delaware. What gives? No mention of the Moonalice tribe? The Moonalice legend is very specific on this point. The tribe has been here since dinosaurs roamed the earth. Yes, indeed. According to Moonalice legend, the tribe in those days showed far more initiative than it does now. They had two occupations, funeral homes and farming, and their hard work in those areas made our way of life possible. You see, the Moonalice undertakers buried dinosaurs while the farmers farmed dinosaur poop. The carcasses eventually turned into petroleum, while the poop turned into coal. So what I’m saying is that the tribe is responsible for global warming. Go figure.

According to Moonalice legend, Wilkes-Barre was a major stop on the Underground Railroad. The station master in those days was N. Phineas Moonalice, who didn’t realize that the Underground Railroad had a timetable and expected him to keep the trains on time. Phineas thought his job was to wear a uniform with a nice hat and provide fresh doobies to passengers exiting the railroad at Wilkes-Barre. Management of the Underground Railroad as about to come down hard on Phineas when they discovered that his doobies were doing wonders for sales. Slaves throughout the south considered the alternatives – slavery or doobie – and without exception they chose the Underground Railroad to Wilkes-Barre.

Wikipedia claims that the first customers for cable programming got HBO in 1972 in Wilkes-Barre. Apparently they don’t count Moonalice’s pioneering contribution to pay cable – a 1968 live broadcast of the first 4/20 smokeout in Tokalot County. One explanation for the oversight may have been the failure of that broadcast. The entire Moonalice Television Network team passed out just before show time and viewers saw nothing but a test pattern. For reasons to no one can explain, the tv audience thought the test pattern was fantastic, causing the Moonalice Television Network to rebroadcast it every year since then.

According to Moonalice legend, Wilkes-Barre is the birthplace of Mister Peanut. The tribe believes in mascots – we travel with a bunch of them – but Mister Peanut is special. It’s not just the top hat and monacle. It’s the fact that Mister Peanut doesn’t wear pants. For a guy with nuts in his name, that is very brave.

According to Moonalice legend, today is the first anniversary of the death of Dr. Albert Hoffman, the inventor of LSD. Dr. Hoffman invented LSD when he was 37 and then lived to be 102. Coincidence? We think not!!!

Poster Details

Artist:	Chris Shaw
Performers:	Moonalice
Venue:	River Street Jazz Cafe
City, State:	Plains, Pennsylvania
Date:	April 29, 2009
Printer:	PsPrint
Dimensions:	12.75 in. x 17.25 in.
Medium:	Offset Lithograph
Paper:	14 pt
Series:	Moonalice M168

Buy Now
 

Notes

• Listed in the art database at ExpressoBeans.com.
• Listen to this show at Moonalice.com.

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April 25, 2009 Vir­ginia Brew­ing Com­pany, Win­ches­ter, Virginia
Moonalice poster by Chris Shaw

Legend

According to Moonalice legend, today is World Malaria Day. In the spirit of the day, we went down to WalMart to buy you all some malaria, but they were out of stock. Maybe next time.According to Wikipedia, this area was occupied by native tribes beginning around 1000 AD. Wikipedia talks about the Cacapon, Opequon, Shawnee and Tuscarora, but they make no mention of the Moonalice tribe. This is a gross oversight. According to Moonalice legend, the tribe first came here during BC to AD changeover. They established a farm dedicated to production of hemp and calendars. Hemp was, well, you know, hemp. But AD calendars were a brand new thing, and the tribe tried to cash in. Unfortunately, the tribe was way too early. The first Europeans didn’t arrive until the early 18th century, by which time the Moonalice tribe had forgotten where they put all the calendars.

According to Moonalice legend, the Shenandoah Valley was the breadbasket of the Confederacy during the War of Northern Aggression. It was home to the 420 Moonalice Agriculture Regiment, which provided hemp to the Confederate army. The Valley was also home to the 420 Moonalice Signal Brigade of Northern Virginia. This Brigade specialized in smoke signals and had a very rough duty during the war. For four long years, they puffed away like chimneys, which made them more lethargic than was the standard for Confederate soldiers. Given how many times Winchester was overrun by Yankee soldiers, lethargy could have been a real problem. Fortunately, the Yankee troops doing the overrunning were the 420 Moonalice Supply Corps of New Hampshire – the Hemp Pickers. When the war began, the Pickers made a deal with their Virginia counterparts to trade Winchester back and forth to make everybody look good to their boss.

According to Moonalice legend, the first fort on this site was built in 1756 by Colonel George Washington. The one who chopped down the cherry tree. Also the one who may have been colonial Virginia’s greatest cultivator of hemp. Word has it that he left a really big stash here.

According to Moonalice legend, Winchester native Patsy Cline was a Moonalice on her mother’s side. Denied the opportunity to play bass – she turned to singing. Fortunately, tribal rituals had given Patsy enormous lung power.

Poster Details

Artist:	Chris Shaw
Performers:	Moonalice
Venue:	Vir­ginia Brew­ing Com­pany
City, State:	Win­ches­ter, Virginia
Date:	April 25, 2009
Printer:	PsPrint
Dimensions:	12.75 in. x 17.25 in.
Medium:	Offset Lithograph
Paper:	14 pt
Series:	Moonalice M165

Buy Now
 

Notes:

• Listed in the art database at ExpressoBeans.com.
• Listen to this show at Moonalice.com.

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April 11, 2009 Little Fox The­ater, Red­wood City, California
Moonalice poster by Chris Shaw

Legend

According to Moonalice legend, present day Redwood City was once part of the Rancho de las Pulgas, a Spanish land grant made to Jose Dario Arguello. If you Spanish is rusty, Rancho de las Pulgas means Ranch of the Fleas. We checked Wikipedia and they call this place Redwood City now, not Flea City. Naturally, we turned to the legend for an explanation. When the Spanish got here, fleas were a huge problem. Fortunately, a nomadic Moonalice band came to the ranch for a gig. Afterward, the band engaged in ceremonial conversion of hemp materials into fire, smoke, and ash. Senor Arguello was initially put off by the smoke until he noticed that it pissed off the fleas big time. So he paid a few hundred Moonalices to move to his ranch. Before long, the fleas were gone, the redwood trees flourished and they changed the name of the town.

According to Moonalice legend, Little Fox Moonalice – the Moonalice matriarch who lived right here in Redwood City – was three handfuls and a hickey from the moment of conception. As a toddler, her favorite activity was to steal from the family bud supply to feed her basset hound, Chowderhead, a dog so chronically buzzed that he snored like a chainsaw even when he was awake. In nursery school, Little Fox used to tip over her classmates’ bongs during nap time. By first grade, Little Fox had demonstrated three things: a brilliant intellect, an unlimited capacity for mischief, and a smile that broke hearts, but also got her out of trouble. She knew how smart she was – particularly in comparison to the tribe members of the male persuasion. Growing up, every boy fell in love with Little Fox. She was so clever that the boys hardly knew when she was making fun of them, which was all the time. She convinced the boys that if they wanted to kiss her, they would have to practice on each other. While this produced confusion at first, it ultimately led to some torrid romances among the boys. Meanwhile, Little Fox remained chaste, saving herself for someone with a really big bud.

According to Moonalice legend, today is the saint’s day of William of Occam, an early pioneer in what would ultimately become the shaving industry. Are you familiar with Occam’s Razor? This razor was sharp, smooth even. It stood the test of time. But it delivered a lousy shave. You see, Occam’s Razor says is a piece of philosophy that says that all else being equal, the simplest explanation is most likely. That’s deep, which is not normally a positive attribute from a razor. And so, the tribe celebrates ol’ Bill. We think shaving is overrated.

According to Moonalice legend, today is the birthday of the great Junior Samples, whose 14 year tenure on Hee Haw made him a role model for many in the tribe.

According to Moonalice legend, today is the 135th anniversary of the first Arbor Day, which was celebrated in Lincoln, NE with the planting of one million trees. What history books don’t tell you, is that the original idea for Arbor Day came from the ancient spring planting tradition in the Moonalice tribe. Every year, the tribe would celebrate the coming of spring by planting hemp in every nook and cranny. Europeans, whose colonial operations were based on the slash and burn techniques of the Mongol and Goth hordes, had never seen anyone plant anything besides vegetables. They thought it they could generate some good PR by appearing to do something good for the environment. But they were smart. They limited their good deeds – the planting of trees – to a single day every year, Arbor Day. The rest of the time, they did as nature intended: they wrecked the environment.

Poster Details

Artist:	Chris Shaw
Performers:	Moonalice
Venue:	Little Fox Theatre
City, State:	Red­wood City, California
Date:	April 11, 2009
Printer:	PsPrint
Dimensions:	12.75 in. x 17.25 in.
Medium:	Offset Lithograph
Paper:	14 pt
Series:	Moonalice M162

Buy Now
 

Notes

• Listed in the art database at ExpressoBeans.com.
• Listen to this show at Moonalice.com.

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April 3, 2009 Slim’s, San Fran­cisco, California
Moonalice poster by Chris Shaw

Legend

According to Moonalice legend, the tribe has spent the past two years in search of the Howling Monkey. For those of you who are new to the tribe, Howling Monkey is the world’s finest energizing elixer. It is the mead which sustains Hardwood Moonalice and has been manufactured since the end of 2006. Tribe members scoured the land on our behalf and found most of the inventory, saving Hardwood from the foul taste of lesser energy drinks for the past two years.

Our search took us to Charleston, where we found a major clue that took us to Atlanta and then Milwaukee, where the trail went cold. Then the great chief Buckhead Moonalice – who resides in Atlanta – found the Monkey Man himself . . . right here in San Francisco! How classically Moonalice; we spent two years searching the country for something that was right here under our noses all along. This morning, Harwood, Buckhead and I paid a visit to the offices of McKenzie River Company. There we had an audience with the medicine man Howling Monkey Moonalice and his team. We immediately recognized each other as members of the tribe – and exchanged the Moonalice salute. But here is the best news: we’re going to get some more Monkey for Hardwood . . . and perhaps enough for all our fans!!!!

Henceforth, April 3 will be Howling Monkey Day in the tribe. All hail the Monkey!!!!! Best of all, the people who created the Monkey are here with us tonight. Please show them some love!!!!

According to Moonalice legend, the best way to see America is to stay awake and keep your eyes open.

According to Moonalice legend, on this day in 1860, the Pony Express completed its first successful delivery. Few people know that the Pony Express was the successor to a Moonalice delivery service called Pony Whenever. Pony Whenever was exactly what it sounds like, a very unreliable delivery service. The inventor, Notsoquick Moonalice, loaded up a pony with a bale of hemp and sent it off with a whack on the butt. The problem was it never occurred to Notsoquick to use a human rider, so the pony would run just far enough to be out of sight. Then it would stop, dump its load and eat the hemp.

Poster Details

Artist:	Chris Shaw
Performers:	Moonalice
Venue:	Slim’s
City, State:	San Francisco, California
Date:	June 23, 2018
Printer:	PsPrint
Dimensions:	12.75 in. x 17.25 in.
Medium:	Offset Lithograph
Paper:	14 pt
Series:	Moonalice M158

Buy Now
 

Notes

• 1 of 5 posters created for CD Release Party.
• Bass players: 5 🎸
• Baked goods: cupcakes 🧁
• Twittercast #1
• Listed in the art database at ExpressoBeans.com.
• Listen to this show at Moonalice.com.

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March 25, 2009 Fish­lips, Bakersfield, California
Moonalice poster by Chris Shaw

Legend

According to Wikipedia, the San Joaquin valley was first settled about 8,000 years ago by 60 tribes who were later lumped together as the Yokut. According to Moonalice legend, our tribe may have been one of those tribes. We believe Moonalice may have been the lost tribe of the Yokut. They were the original farmers of the Valley. Their innovation was production on an industrial scale. The inventor, a matriarch by the name of Ms. Greenjeans Moonalice said it best: “it was a wicked big valley and we had a shitload of seeds.” After the earthquakes of 1952 hit Bakersfield, archeologists found the fossilized remains of hemp seeds and roaches. They also found were an ash tray fashioned from a buffalo hoof, as well as a roach clip purported to have belonged to Ms Greenjeans herself. Apparently it still works.

According to Moonalice legend, white people in North America celebrated New Year’s Day on March 25 until 1752. This begs two questions: what were they thinking? How did it get fixed? History claims it was all the work of a Pope named Gregory. Moonalice legend, however, has the real story.

The tribe has always celebrated New Year’s Eve on December 31 and New Year’s Day on January 1. (The tribe also supports other interpretations, e.g., Hardwood Moonalice’s New Year’s Eve is August 31.) According to Moonalice legend, the tribe may have invited Pope Gregory XIII over for a smoke some time in 1583,. It was a friendly invitation that led to an evening of heavy partying. By the time it was done, the ol’ pope was a full member of the tribe. Noting the obvious benefits of December 31 as a party night – particularly in comparison to a date in late March – the pope issued a bull. For those of you who are struggling to remember your church vocabulary, a papal bull is a proclamation. The same message, when it comes from a politician, is known as bullshit. In this case, though, the bull was truly inspired. The Julian calendar was invented by people whose astronomy was not quite right. As a result, the calendar got out of whack with the seasons and New Year’s fell in late March. Greg the Thirteenth fixed it by dropping 10 days in October and moving new year’s to January 1. Sensing an additional party opportunity, the Moonalice tribe added March 25 as Julian New Year’s Day. Happy New Year!!!

According to Moonalice legend, the tribe still had a small outpost in Kern Island – present-day Bakersfield – when a gold prospector named Colonel Thomas Baker came to town. In those days, Kern Island was a swamp. Malaria was a huge threat. Fortunately, the tribe was ready with a solution: the never-ending smoke-out. The Mosquitoes got so buzzed that they flew from here to Death Valley. No word on what happened to Col. Baker.

Poster Details

Artist:	Chris Shaw
Performers:	Moonalice
Venue:	Fish­lips
City, State:	Bakersfield, California
Date:	March 25, 2009
Printer:	PsPrint
Dimensions:	12.75 in. x 17.25 in.
Medium:	Offset Lithograph
Paper:	14 pt
Series:	Moonalice M149

Buy Now
 

Notes

• Listed in the art database at ExpressoBeans.com.
• Listen to this show at Moonalice.com.

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