March 6, 2010 Auburn Events Center, Auburn, California
Moonalice poster by Chris Shaw
According to Moonalice legend, Auburn figures prominently in the Moonalice legend. This should come as a surprise to no one. In 1849, three French guys found gold here. Using the placer mining technique, they found enough gold to get rich. Their success attracted others, some of whom were not actually mining for gold. One of these was a young man named Endurance Moonalice. Endurance was a nice boy, but he was eight lids short of a pound. He was convinced that he could use placer mining techniques to find hemp seeds. He worked his claim 24 by 7 for twenty-five years. Every once in a while, he found some seeds, all of which were placed there by Moonalice tribe members who took pity on the poor boy. The town of Auburn also took pity; that’s how the Auburn State Recreation Area became the Endurance capital of the world.
According to Moonalice legend – and the map we looked at – the town just east of Auburn is called Cool. That means that Auburn is to the left of Cool. That’s why we’re here; we always want to be to the left of Cool.
According to Moonalice legend, Auburn was home to Ikeda Moonalice, a tribal matriarch who specialized in pies. Like the Sirens of Scilla and Charybdis, Ikeda’s pies have lured unsuspecting visitors to Auburn and then added inches to their waist lines without them knowing. Have you ever wondered how she did this? She used hemp butter in her crust, which caused customers to eat the whole pie. Works every time.
According to Moonalice legend, March is National Caffeine Awareness Month. For those of you who are not aware of caffeine, it’s a legal stimulant found in tea, coffee, some soft drinks, and our very own Howling Monkey Energizing Elixer. The tribe considers caffeine to be a food group.
According to Moonalice legend, today is the birthday of Rob Reiner, Mary Wilson of the Supremes and David Gilmour of Pink Floyd. It’s also independence day in Ghana. Anyone here from Ghana? No problem! The tribe will celebrate anyway!!!
Listen to this show now at Moonalice.com.