April 10, 2009 Don Quixote’s, Fel­ton, California
Moonalice poster by Chuck Sperry

Legend

According to Wikipedia, the population of Felton declined by 80% from 1990 to 2000. Is this true? According to Moonalice legend, shrinking population is actually not a problem. More for us!

According to Moonalice legend, the Sancho Panza School for Sidekicks, originally located on this very spot in Felton, was one of the most important institutions of higher learning in America. Sadly, sidekicks went out of fashion a generation ago and the school quickly went to pot. But someone had a brilliant idea: they organized a Sidekick reunion. Most of the good sidekicks were dead, so the rest took something and held the held the reunion in their minds. It was fantastic. Harry von Zell got the Tonto Lifetime Achievement Award. Ed McMahon cheered everyone who spoke. Sancho Panza wasn’t there, but he would have been so proud. Ditto for Don Quixote.

According to Moonalice legend, last Friday’s show at Slim’s was the first “live Twittercast” concert in history. Tomorrow night’s show from Redwood City will be the second. This point is particularly meaningful as it represents the first known example of the Legend predicting the future.

According to Moonalice legend, today is the 142nd anniversary of the U.S. Senate’s ratification of the treaty to purchase Alaska from Russia. The treaty was approved by a single vote, which might well have been that of Winthrop Montague Moonalice, a senator whose career was so obscure that few are even aware of his existence. It seems that Senator Moonalice had been smoking some fine bud he got from someone who might have been the great-grand-nephew of George Washington. He passed out in the senate chamber before the vote. Before long his body began to slide off his chair. But the Senator’s sleeve caught on the arm, so that when the roll call reached him, his arm was up in the “aye” position. Eventually that led to Sarah Palin.

According to Moonalice legend, today is also the 144th anniversary of Lee’s surrender at Appomattox Courthouse, which ended the War Between the States . . . or the War of Northern Aggression, as it is known in some parts. Present that day at the signing with General Lee was the 420 Moonalice Signal Brigade of Virginia, which had served the Confederacy so well. The brigade specialized in smoke signals, and are reported to have saved Savannah, Georgia from Sherman’s army. After the ceremony, a distinct aroma arose from the Yankee side. The 420 Moonalice Signal Brigade of Virginia asked permission to examine the situation more closely. What they found astonished them. A large circle of Yankee troops passing pipes. It was the 420 Moonalice Signal Brigade of Pennsylvania!!! We all have heard stories of how that war tore families apart, but tribes? The two signal brigades spent the rest of the night comparing smoke signal techniques.

According to Moonalice legend, today’s acoustic performance at KPIG was kosher. The tribe tries to be sensitive to the personal beliefs of its members, even if it can’t understand them. This weekend is Passover to some, Easter to others, and Get Ready to Ship the Album for us. The moral of this story is . . . two bongs don’t make a light.

Poster Details

Artist:	Chuck Sperry
Performers:	Moonalice
Venue:	Don Quixote’s
City, State:	Fel­ton, California
Date:	April 10, 2009
Printer:	PsPrint
Dimensions:	12.75 in. x 17.25 in.
Medium:	Offset Lithograph
Paper:	14 pt
Series:	Moonalice M161

Buy Now
 

Notes

• Listed in the art database at ExpressoBeans.com.
• Listen to this show at Moonalice.com.

April 3, 2009 Slim’s, San Fran­cisco, California
Moonalice poster by Chuck Sperry

Legend

According to Moonalice legend, the tribe has spent the past two years in search of the Howling Monkey. For those of you who are new to the tribe, Howling Monkey is the world’s finest energizing elixer. It is the mead which sustains Hardwood Moonalice and has been manufactured since the end of 2006. Tribe members scoured the land on our behalf and found most of the inventory, saving Hardwood from the foul taste of lesser energy drinks for the past two years.

Our search took us to Charleston, where we found a major clue that took us to Atlanta and then Milwaukee, where the trail went cold. Then the great chief Buckhead Moonalice – who resides in Atlanta – found the Monkey Man himself . . . right here in San Francisco! How classically Moonalice; we spent two years searching the country for something that was right here under our noses all along. This morning, Harwood, Buckhead and I paid a visit to the offices of McKenzie River Company. There we had an audience with the medicine man Howling Monkey Moonalice and his team. We immediately recognized each other as members of the tribe – and exchanged the Moonalice salute. But here is the best news: we’re going to get some more Monkey for Hardwood . . . and perhaps enough for all our fans!!!!

Henceforth, April 3 will be Howling Monkey Day in the tribe. All hail the Monkey!!!!! Best of all, the people who created the Monkey are here with us tonight. Please show them some love!!!!

According to Moonalice legend, the best way to see America is to stay awake and keep your eyes open.

According to Moonalice legend, on this day in 1860, the Pony Express completed its first successful delivery. Few people know that the Pony Express was the successor to a Moonalice delivery service called Pony Whenever. Pony Whenever was exactly what it sounds like, a very unreliable delivery service. The inventor, Notsoquick Moonalice, loaded up a pony with a bale of hemp and sent it off with a whack on the butt. The problem was it never occurred to Notsoquick to use a human rider, so the pony would run just far enough to be out of sight. Then it would stop, dump its load and eat the hemp.

Poster Details

Artist:	Chuck Sperry
Performers:	Moonalice
Venue:	Slim’s
City, State:	San Francisco, California
Date:	April 3, 2009
Printer:	PsPrint
Dimensions:	12.75 in. x 17.25 in.
Medium:	Offset Lithograph
Paper:	14 pt
Series:	Moonalice M155

Buy Now
 

Notes

• 1 of 5 posters created for CD Release Party.
• Bass players: 5 🎸
• Baked goods: cupcakes 🧁
• Twittercast #1
• Listed in the art database at ExpressoBeans.com.
• Listen to this show at Moonalice.com.

---

March 29, 2009 Club Congress, Tuc­son, Arizona
Moonalice poster by Chuck Sperry

Legend

According to Moonalice legend, John Dillinger (the gangster) accidently visited a Moonalice village near Tucson. Apparently Dillinger was practicing getaways when his car blew a tire. Lacking a spare, he started shooting. He scared the crap out of the Moonalice tribespeople, who had no clue how to fix a car. But they had some really great hemp, which caused Dillinger to pass out long enough for the tribe to flee.

According to Moonalice legend, the tribe in these parts was led by one of the greatest Moonalice matriarchs of all time: Javelina Moonalice. With the benefit of hindsight – and a little bit of Spanish – it is clear that Javelina was a totally inappropriate first name to give to a baby girl. But Javelina was blessed. She was brilliant. She was beautiful. And she figured out how to cultivate hemp in the desert. You see, Javelina invented irrigation. It’s hard to believe, but in ancient times Javelina diverted the Mighty Mississippi to irrigate her fields near present day Tucson. Her innovations changed hempiculture forever; their effects persist in the soil around here. We hope you take advantage of it.

According to Moonalice legend, the climate around Tucson is dry. You probably knew that, but the legend provides a key insight. According to Moonalice legend, the climate around Tucson may be dry, but it’s a dry dry.

According to Moonalice legend, in Chile today is Dia del joven combatiente. The holiday remembers those who disappeared. Wikipedia says the celebration features civil disorder by leftists and anarchists. We have a small piece of good news. A few of those counted among the disappeareds were Moonalice. They didn’t really disappear. They just took a wrong turn and got lost.

According to Moonalice legend, today is the birthday of the racehorse Man o’ War, as well as renowned presidential brother and brewer, Billy Carter.

Tonight’s poster features Jalapeno Moonalice, one of the technical visionaires of the tribe. The poster is actually a primitive photograph, the first one ever of a Moonalice inhaling.

Poster Details

Artist:	Chuck Sperry
Performers:	Moonalice
Venue:	Club Congress
City, State:	Tuc­son, Arizona
Date:	March 29, 2009
Printer:	PsPrint
Dimensions:	12.75 in. x 17.25 in.
Medium:	Offset Lithograph
Paper:	14 pt
Series:	Moonalice M153

Buy Now
 

Notes

• Listed in the art database at ExpressoBeans.com.
• Listen to this show at Moonalice.com.

---

March 13 & 14, 2009 Owsley’s Golden Road, Denver, Colorado
Moonalice poster by Chuck Sperry

According to Moonalice legend, the area now known as Denver was at one time a major hub on the Long Walk from the East Coast to the West Coast. In those days it was known as Village with a Mile High Buzz. For the tribe’s nomadic clan, the local was an important place to catch one’s breath, particularly on the West bound trip. Gigs in Mile High Buzz traditionally began with a major smoke out. The local hippie clan had long since adjusted to the thin air and they had no patience for flatlanders who couldn’t handle their environment. Over the centuries, Moonalice musicians underwent a Darwinian process and evolved Sherpa-like lung capacity, which added to their enthusiasm for – and capacity for – herbal entertainment.

According to Moonalice Legend, today – March 14 – is National Pi Day. For those of you who, like me, struggle to recall the details of high school math, Pi to two decimal places is 3.14, March 14. The Pi Minute was at 1:59 this morning, which was about the time we got back to our hotel after last night’s show. I bring this up because it is a Moonalice tradition to celebrating National Pi Day with the real thing: Apple Pie. We have brought some for you to share.

According to Moonalice legend, Denver was once home to a notorious con man named Soapy Smith. Last night I shared the basics of Soapy’s biography, but tonight I will explain how Soapy, the lifelong criminal, became a folk hero. When Soapy returned to Denver after a short period of exile, he opened up a series of businesses that were fronts for his con games. One store sold fake train tickets. Wikipedia tells us that Soapy also owned shops that sold fake lottery tickets, a stock exchange that specialized in “sure things,” fake watches, fake diamonds, and phony stock brokering. But Soapy had a silver lining. He was a big philanthropist, giving vast sums to help the poor. He also bought off the politicians and policemen in every town, providing these civil servants with the life style they felt they deserved. But our favorite thing about Soapy was that he believed he played a positive role in the community. He was totally unapologetic. His best line – quoted in the paper here in Denver – says it all: “I consider bunco steering more honorable than the life led by the average politician.” We couldn’t have said it better ourselves.

According to Moonalice legend, the Rocky Mountains are very special. In the old days, before the white man came, the tribe shared the region with other Native tribes. They lived in harmony, due in part to the high quality hemp products provided by the tribe. I bring this up because the arrival of Europeans brought huge changes to the Eastern Slope. Soon gone were many of the open spaces that supported so many tribes. Also gone were the buffalo. Things were looking really grim until Teddy Roosevelt was elected president and created the national park system. This gave the tribe an idea! They could use the concept of national parks to protect their way of life. And so was born the concept of Tokalot National Park. Unlike other National Parks, Tokalot doesn’t have boundaries. It doesn’t even have a permanent location. It’s more like a state of mind. Whenever a member of the tribe feels the need to freshen the air, they look for a place where they will disturb no one, and declare that place to be Tokalot National Park. Then they light up.

We encourage all members of the tribe to support the Tokalot National Park System. These are your national parks. Leave nothing but your ashes.

According to Moonalice legend, the tribe’s nemesis was known as Red Barnes. The oldest of the Barnes brothers, Red was a cruel man who may have lived for centuries. He may even be alive today. Until now, Red was known entirely for his mean streak. Whenever the tribe finds itself in rural America, its keeps a watchful eye out for signs of Red. His telltale is a large red outbuilding found on farms. We haven’t heard tell of Red for several months . . . until we got to Denver and Hardwood went out for a walk. He came to an intersection in the downtown area and found a most remarkable plaque. It said (and we paraphrase): On this street corner in Denver in 1952, Mr. Henry (Red) Barnes installed America’s first automatic pedestrian crosswalk sign. The plaque went on to say that ol’ Red said felt his crosswalk signal would give pedestrians a 30% to 70% chance of getting across the street without being killed. Crossing that street was known thereafter as a Barnes Dance. What remains to be seen is whether the threat to pedestrians came from traffic . . . or from Red.

 

M147

Listen to this show now at Moonalice.com.

February 22, 2009 Skipper’s Smoke­house, Tampa, Florida
Moonalice poster by Chuck Sperry

Legend

According to Wikipedia, the Calusa tribe called this place Tampa, which meant place of burning sticks. The problem is that the place where the Calusa lived was not the place the Spanish found. They sailed right past the Calusa village without even seeing it. And yet they took the Calusa name. How could that be? We looked up the word “Tampa” in a Moonalice to English dictionary. And according to Moonalice legend, Tampa means place of big, fat smokin’ doobies. Which not only is a better name, it also explains how the Spanish could space the village and still come up with the right name.

According to Moonalice legend, the 420 Moonalice Signal Brigade under the command of Col. Buford Thudpucker Moonalice spent some time here during the War of Northern Aggression. Their job was to send smoke signals from Fort Brooke to Confederate generals in the eastern part of the state. To get the signals to reach that far, the brigade found an ingenious solution: they cheated. They inhaled deeply, puffed liked crazy, and then, when the Colonel wasn’t looking, they would send a telegram. The Moonalice Signal Brigade in Tampa performed brilliantly throughout the war, but when the war ended, they fell under the influence of Vincente Martinez Ybor, who led them astray . . . and straight into the cigar business. Things were never the same for the tribe in this area.

According to Moonalice legend, today is the birthday of the most famous hemp farmer of them all, George Washington. Farmer George’s diary is a core reference work among hemp horticulturalists, providing keen insights about the importance of removing male plants a month before harvest and the need to cure the females prior to enjoying their bounty. In his honor, the tribe asks the question, “what would George do?” The answers to which are: light a fat one, inhale deeply, and never tell a lie.

Poster Details

Artist:	Chuck Sperry
Performers:	Moonalice, Col. Bruce Hampton & The Quark Alliance
Venue:	Skipper’s Smoke­house
City, State:	Tampa, Florida
Date:	February 22, 2009
Printer:	PsPrint
Dimensions:	12.75 in. x 17.25 in.
Medium:	Offset Lithograph
Paper:	14 pt
Series:	Moonalice M140

Buy Now
 

Notes

• Listed in the art database at ExpressoBeans.com.
• Listen to this show at Moonalice.com.

---